Twas the night before Ironman Camp...

... and all through the hotel not a triathlete was stirring not even Roch or Paul :)

Got to Post Falls, ID (about 10 min from Coeur d'Alene) for Ironman Camp today and can hardly believe the weekend has finally arrived.

Coming into camp I definitely have a lot of conflicted emotions. On the one hand I'm sooooo totally excited. I *GET* to spend the entire weekend swimming, biking and running alongside the best of the best in the very place where I will be toeing the line 8 weeks from Sunday. On the other hand there are those old demons that whisper "you're going to be the slowest person at camp, the fattest, etc etc".

Ironically I think my journey towards the starting line of the Ironman has made me care less about those whispers. Part of the reason I did the Danskin as my first triathlon was because I was guarenteed not to be the final finisher. There's no such guarentee at Ironman. In fact being the final finisher is celebrated at Ironman and the closer I get to lining up for the big day the less I care about what other people think.

When I look into the mirror I still see the fat girl. I see the girl that shouldn't be wearing spandex and even thinking about a crazy thing like Ironman nevermind actually training for it. But I'm here. It's like part of the Ironman journey for me is facing those demons and kicking their ass because I deserve to be on the starting line as much as the next person.

The more I train the more I realize that becoming an Ironman really is about the journey and not about the destination. It's about finding yourself and facing challenges. When I'm riding my bike in pouring rain or running towards the back of the pack I'm not thinking about whether I'm going to be the slowest or the fattest. I'm thinking about what I need to do to finish that workout and get to the next one.

Tomorrow I am not the fat girl or the slow girl.

Tomorrow I'm just an athlete on an adventure.

Bring it on :)